FactaBot

Peter Dutton’s nuclear energy crusade is getting some serious static in Gippsland, and it’s not just from old AM radios. Nationals MP Darren Chester, usually the region’s political mascot, is now playing hide-and-seek with his own voters while calling for a “calm conversation” on nuclear power.

Calm would’ve been great—if he’d shown up to any of the actual community meetings. Locals say they feel ghosted, and honestly, Darren’s RSVP game is weaker than a dodgy power grid in a blackout. This from the man who once declared wind turbines “visual pollution,” but apparently radioactive waste is just rustic charm?

Here’s the tea: Dutton and his Coalition comrades are dusting off the nuclear debate like it’s a vintage record—except nobody asked for a remix. Their shiny new plan wants to plonk small modular reactors into regions like Gippsland, home to the now-defunct Hazelwood coal plant. The idea? Replace one environmental headache with another, but this time make it glow.

Locals, however, aren’t lining up for radioactive roulette. Instead, they’re demanding consultation, transparency, and some actual detail—preferably before the uranium hits the fan. Zooming out, the whole thing smells a lot like political cosplay. Dutton’s nuclear pitch is being marketed as “clean energy,” even as his party trashes renewables at every other opportunity.

Let’s not forget this is the same Coalition that gutted climate policy for years, and now suddenly wants to play Captain Planet. There’s also a global cost curve to reckon with: nuclear is slow, expensive, and notoriously allergic to budget deadlines—perfect for a party obsessed with economic “discipline.” The latest scene?

Chester is dodging town halls like they’re TikTok challenges, leaving community groups to fill the vacuum with signs, sass, and serious concern. Gippslanders aren’t anti-energy—they’re anti-BS. And if Dutton thinks they’ll glow along quietly, he might want to rethink that reactor placement… preferably from a safe distance.